Were you so negatively effected by your parents it has ruined your abilities to cope with problems?

Wow I envy you to be able to talk about your past and situations as it pertain to you but I also envy and acknowledge what a strong independent woman you are. But I too have had some issues when I was growing up as a child that effected my adult years. We as women bear a lot and can take on some much stress that we haven't even noticed the great things about ourselves. It sounds to me that you are wonderful person a great mother and despite everything that you have been through from your child hood till now you are still maintaining. You are a very special person and even though it's hard we have to learn that what has happened to us in the past is what it is the past and in order to push on with our future we have to live for today and not in our past. And your mother is not a reflection of what you are or what you will be in the future please dont live off of fear of being your mother cause your not we are our own individuals and we are what makes us not our past or our parents, also seek some professional help if you think this will help you, I wish you the best of luck.