Were any of you brought up by parents that confused you with their moral guidance?

I'm 36 now and really struggling with the hypocritical way my mother raised us. Yes I know she did the best to her ability with the hand she was dealt but it's really affecting me because their were 6 of us and i'm raising my daughter alone so my cirstances are different to my mums and she is always going on about how I should have and be raising her. The whole family dynamics are making me feel insane. I'm waiting to go to counceling but not sure how long it will take and at the moment i'm in no financial predicament thanks to the recession I have to stay close to my family. I feel like i'm living in a haze and I used to be so happy go lucky. my mum keeps making me feel like my daughter was a mistake but I do not want to or feel like my daughter was. She was a blessing to me and is a joy to be around. I have no idea if it is me with the problem or my mum with the problem but at the moment we are blaming each other and it's making life hell. My mum says she loves my daughter in one breath and then she is saying to me in front of my daughter that she wishes she had flushed me out now it's hurting like mad in case my daughter begins to think she was. It's pretty messed up i'm admitting and seeking help because I think I am depressed and need help but my mum is not she thinks it's just me. I tell my daughter often she was not a mistake and that she was indeed a blessing in the hopes it will undoe any damage that may have been done. My daughter is 18 btw.